Monday, June 27, 2011

Finding Rest

The other day I was sitting with a friend telling him how tired I have been lately - that I can fall asleep on the floor for 5-6 hours without even meaning to. Basically anytime I stop moving my body is demanding sleep. He pointed out that when I do things I usually give 164% - meaning I'm not satisfied with just getting things done, they have to be done to the best of my ability and then some. "Give yourself a break."

Then yesterday a firetruck drove by our house - not at all unusual - but the siren wasn't on. The child and my boy saw it and told me about it. When I told them I didn't hear it, the child said, "The siren wasn't on because fire people need to rest sometimes, Mom. That's what God said."


If she gets it, why can't I?

There is a lot to do around here, and I really have been trying to keep up with my regular work plus catch up on a long list of deferred projects. None of it is worth losing rest over, though. So these are some of the things I'm trying to remind myself to do:

  • Take it when you can get it. My twins still take a nap almost every day. It is one of my favorite times of day. They share a room, and without some supervision at the beginning of nap time they will talk and play (and body slam) with each other instead of going to sleep. Some time ago I started sitting in the room with them, watching them only peripherally while I read or worked on my laptop. If I did not take this time to stop each day I would undoubtedly just run myself ragged. I still get stuff done, but it is quiet, sitting, and it's as close as I get to me time each day.  Now what I will do when they stop napping? I dunno yet.
  • Listen to your body. When it says it is tired it means it. I'm still hoping it's just sleep deficit that has me so drained, but soon-ish I'll be up for my annual check up and will ask the doctor to check for any underlying concerns - anemia or thyroid issues. Meanwhile I'm trying to be good and sleep when I need to. Easier said than done.
  • Pat yourself on the back for all that you do. This goes to the 164% problem. I have a weekly to do list (seriously it's a spreadsheet that tracks what I do/don't do each week). It's kind of like the half-full/half-empty glass question. Which one will I focus on? I tend to get after myself for the lingering project from November and the other things I didn't do. For some reason I forget the 21 meals (plus snacks) I prepared, the 7 loads of laundry I washed (OK maybe didn't fold), the daily fun activities for the kids, the writing, the office work, etc. etc. etc. that I DID GET DONE! At the end of the week there's way more that I did than I didn't. I need to remember that.
  • The ultimate source of rest is God. So the main reason I focus on what I didn't do is worry. It always has been my biggest struggle to keep from worrying about things. I used to worry when I didn't have something to worry about. Really. I'm getting better. Still I need to remember that God wants to and will take care of me and provide what I need for each situation.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV)

How do you find rest?

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